A younger female relative, on hearing that Will split and is now working at a topless bar:
“ Sorry about your ex~ he's an ass I’m sure. Hey just cuz he got hired at the titty bar don’t mean he can get any titties. That’s usually just what’s going through our heads~when in reality, the little skanks he works with probably wouldn’t even give him the time of day- so don’t feel bad~ working with them is probably as close as he’s getting to a boob right now~ and even if he is getting some p*s*y, its probably contaminated with something, or at least you can hope. Its sucks picturing your man with some bitch but if there’s nothing you can do, at least pray she’s a dirty one and his ding-a-ling will blister up and dissolve. “
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